Second Negative

The on-line hunting experience

I know it’s probably a black mark on my Texas citizenship, but I’ve never managed to kill any large horned animals. Things might have turned out differently had my father not passed away when I was a child, but there were other members of my family that hunted, and they didn’t take me along either. It could have been because I was a mean little bastard, and nobody wanted to take me out in the woods. Maybe they thought I’d shoot them. My parents wouldn’t even let me have a BB gun, and not just because I shot my brother in the head. I also enjoyed setting up in sniper mode and then shooting out all the light bulbs in the barn. Hey, raise your kids in the country at your own risk.

Watching the local news last night, I discovered that the new wave sweeping the Texas hunting community is online, real time hunting. You see, some genius (redneck) thought up the brilliant idea to put a rifle in a deer blind on a private lease somewhere, and hook it up to a computer so that people could kill from the privacy of their own homes. Their website says “Disabled and handicapped hunters, as well as others who would like to try this type of hunting, will be able to use our system”. Apparently handicapped and disabled hunters lie in bed at night with an itchy trigger finger waiting to get back into the game of “killin’ stuff”.

Save all the comments about my own hypocrisy. I’ll freely admit that I’m not a vegetarian. I love meat. I like it when my steak bleeds a little on the plate. I enjoy making Nicole laugh with my “mooo, the steak is moving” routine. I don’t have a problem with eating animals. They taste good.

My problem is the needless killing of so called “game animals” for sport. Killing is NOT a sport, and in this new modern society of ours, Billy Bob can take his happy ass down to the local grocery store and stock up on dead animals at LOW LOW prices. Yeah, I know it’s not the same as standing over a dying mammal and exchanging grins with your buddies as you finish off your cans of Miller Lite, but nobody said that life was fair.